What we focus on in our lives creates our world. We tend to think that view is the total reality. Every once in a while, something you see or experience shakes up that world view. It is like jumping awake after we doze off. We are startled. Things look different. Things are different.

Working with the Disquiet requires shaking up our world view. We change what we are focused on. Expanding it to include a new view is like increasing the bandwidth. It allows us to see things that were impossible to see before. So the first key step is changing our view.

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One of the key elements I have found in my ongoing work with men and their Disquiet, is the strong desire to be doing work that makes a difference or matters. As we get older, we start realizing the things that seemed to mean so much to us in our early career building years just don’t seem to be as important. We start asking questions like, what else is there for me to do? How can I make a difference? Where do I find meaning? We start thinking about our legacy. How can we leave this place a bit better after our time here?

Acting on these questions often leads us to new ways of living and finding new communities to both support and be supported. We start meeting people who are asking the same questions and are each trying to do something that answers them.

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You have read and heard me describe how many men suffering from Disquiet feel like they are dead inside. They feel disconnected from who they really are and what they have accomplished as men.

Working with your Disquiet brings you face to face with who you really are - your true values, your calling, and your essence. In the process, you see the ways in which who you really are is not showing up in your life - at work, in relationships, and in the world.

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OK, so as I continue to spar and dance with my current surge of Disquiet, turning 50; I added some napalm to the fire:

From my good friend Wesley at LifeTwo.com (who I just interviewed here) comes this humbling piece of wisdom [Source: BoomerGirl.com]:

Even people in top shape need to recognize they’re not kids anymore, says Dr. John Morley, chief of geriatrics at St. Louis University School of Medicine. “You cannot be at 50 what you were at 30.”

Wesley wrote: “Fortunately, it’s not all bad news. Middle age adults and seniors are much stronger similarly aged people were three decades ago. Strides in health care and healthy lifestyles have made living past 50 much more active and fun.”

And there is a lot we can do. But what is actually happening to a 50 yr old bod? Dr Morley says plenty:

How does the body age? Here’s a quick summary of major aspects of aging:

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Want to learn more about the Disquietâ„¢?

Want to get some ideas on how to work with your own Disquiet?

Want to ask me questions?

Here is your first chance! Join me as I discuss the Disquiet and how I work with men and their Disquiet. You can do all of this from the comfort of your home or office.

It happens on March 5 at 5pm EST. Click here for more information. (more…)

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Important information about men and depression.

In the February 26 issue of Newsweek, there is an important cover feature on some of the latest findings about the nature of depression and how more men suffer from it than previously thought. The article has some important findings which I will outline here.

I am writing about this here because some of the key points are related to
Men’s Disquietâ„¢. I want to be careful here. I am not saying that someone who is struggling with their Disquiet is clinically depressed. But the studies are now showing that not dealing with lengthy or severe stress can lead to depression.

Men who suffer from prolonged stress can become depressed. Not dealing with one’s Disquiet can be very stressful.

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