I know I know, Valentines Day. A day of suffering for many folks. This manufactured event for commercial gain has created a lot of stress. First, God help you if you forget. Then, for some, it is automatically following the ritual of card/roses/candy and having no real connection to why they are doing this other than it will be hurtful not to. For others, the pressure to continually top the previous years’ feats of demonstrating the strength of their love or ability to be romantic. And for those who find themselves unattached on this day, trying to ignore all the reminders that they are supposed to be in relationship.

And then comes a nice reminder from 5000+ years ago from a town mentioned in Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet“. Check this out:

ROME (Reuters) - Call it the eternal embrace.

Archaeologists in Italy have discovered a couple buried 5,000 to 6,000 years ago, hugging each other. “It’s an extraordinary case,” said Elena Menotti, who led the team on their dig near the northern city of Mantova.

“There has not been a double burial found in the Neolithic period, much less two people hugging — and they really are hugging.”

Menotti said she believed the two, almost certainly a man and a woman although that needs to be confirmed, died young because their teeth were mostly intact and not worn down.

“I must say that when we discovered it, we all became very excited. I’ve been doing this job for 25 years. I’ve done digs at Pompeii, all the famous sites,” she told Reuters.

“But I’ve never been so moved because this is the discovery of something special.”

Now that is romantic! It is a touching gift from the past. So here’s to looking past the red cardboard heart-shaped boxes and pink-everythings.

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Don’t forget the kids!

Sometimes when we are struggling in our lives, we lose focus of everything but our suffering. Ever notice that? It’s like that becomes the only thing you can really see. Everything else gets blurry. I remember when I decided my next car would be a Subaru Forrester. All of a sudden, that is all I saw on the road!. One day they didn’t exist and the next, the entire human race was driving one. It’s funny how what we are focused on filters what we see - and what we don’t. Those cars weren’t all purchased in one day. This shows up as well in the struggle with the Disquiet. It can consume you, taking all of your focus. And things can disappear from your view.

The idea about focus came up after reading an article on tips for being a good dad at Men’s Health. It was pretty good, but more importantly, it triggered some memories of when I was really struggling through what I figured was a midlife crisis when my kids were in their preteens. (more…)

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One of the hallmark drivers of the Disquiet is the unanswered call to live your life according to your unique calling. Sometimes we have ignored the messages of our true calling and we get off our path. Feeling empty about our life, being lost, suffering a midlife crisis are all about this. Getting back on our path is the work we talk about here.

There is a lot of wisdom from history that trace back to the spiritual traditions and martial arts (for example, Bujinkan and the Bushido code ) on the path of the warrior. In this sense the word “warrior” refers not to soldiering or waging war for profit, but to guardianship and protection. It’s about service and stewardship. It means giving. When we are living our lives through our callings and are totally engaged with it, giving back to others (our family and communities) is more than just our legacy, it is a key component of our internal guidance system. It is who we are in the world.

I recently read an article by my friend, Alvin Soon and he shared a credo that I had once used as a manifesto for my own life. I am grateful to have it show back up in my life. I will now share it with the men I work with.

May it inspire and guide:

Technorati : career coaching, life changes, life coaching, mens issues, midlife, midlife crisis, personal development, personal growth

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And connecting at the same time!

I discovered an interesting brand-new website/blog called Only Human through the help of another great resource, LifeHack. This new site is a creative application of the social community phenomenon that is emerging on the Internet. This is how they describe themselves:

We Are Only Human is a web site dedicated to helping people from each other’s experiences. Only Human is a community where people share stories about mistakes they’ve made in life and their advice to others.

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These are resources and items of interest I found from the web that relate to different aspects of working with the Disquiet. Enjoy!

Personal Productivity:

“How many times have you started a new activity (such as a personal project or exercise routine) with a burst of enthusiasm, only to see that initial momentum evaporate? This often leads to depression and causes us to give up prematurely. I’ve experienced this letdown dozens of times myself. But fortunately, with a bit of thought and reflection you can turn this negative emotion around.” John Wesley helps in “Overcoming the loss of motivation that follows a surge of productivity.”

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On the lighter side:

When you were a kid, did you run around the house with a towel tied from your neck like a cape? Not only did I do that, I used to jump off my roof with a pillowcase tied into a parachute. What did you do? This is definitely a Baby-Boomer thing.

Well, now you can find out for sure. If you are a super hero, which one? Yup there’s a test (of course) you can take. The link is below.

I took the test and here are my results. All that flying paid off!

Your results:
You are Superman

Superman 80% Batman 70% Hulk 65% Spider-Man 60% Green Lantern 55% Catwoman 55% Iron Man 45% Supergirl 45% Robin 35% The Flash 35% Wonder Woman 30%

You are mild-mannered, good, strong and you love to help others.

Click here to take the “Which Superhero am I?” quiz…

Meet you at Gotham City…..

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