Comments on: The Arms Race against your Disquiet http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/ A place for discussion and questions on articles, news and issues pertaining to navigating the unease in men's lives. Thu, 08 Jan 2009 11:55:18 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: Dave Schoof http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1250 Dave Schoof Wed, 18 Apr 2007 02:55:03 +0000 http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1250 Stuart - nicely said. It is a dance isn't it? Stuart - nicely said. It is a dance isn’t it?

]]> By: Dave Schoof http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1249 Dave Schoof Wed, 18 Apr 2007 02:53:54 +0000 http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1249 Deb - you are so right. Playing hard as you describe it is a big help. What I was referrring to is a tendency to get involved in reckless activities or to prove something. These are often done not only as distractions to avoid facing the Disquiet but to actually numb its pain. The activities you are talking about are some of the activities I actually recommend for my clients. That is helping someone navigate their Disquiet not numb it. Deb - you are so right. Playing hard as you describe it is a big help.

What I was referrring to is a tendency to get involved in reckless activities or to prove something.

These are often done not only as distractions to avoid facing the Disquiet but to actually numb its pain.

The activities you are talking about are some of the activities I actually recommend for my clients. That is helping someone navigate their Disquiet not numb it.

]]> By: Deb http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1243 Deb Tue, 17 Apr 2007 11:39:35 +0000 http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1243 Hey Dave Maybe this is different for women, but I know several, including myself, whose midlife crisis has included some of your "play harder" pursuits, but in a happy healthy way. For us, long distance running, for example, is not driven or escapist, but contemplative and joyful, solitary and social, and very much engaged within, including with our disquiet. For me, sports at midlife are not part of an arms race, they are part of coming home to myself as a physical, social and playful person who makes time for recharging mentally and physically every day. I wonder if some men feel the same way, or if sports are much more likely for you/them to be about proving rather than finding yourself? Hey Dave

Maybe this is different for women, but I know several, including myself, whose midlife crisis has included some of your “play harder” pursuits, but in a happy healthy way. For us, long distance running, for example, is not driven or escapist, but contemplative and joyful, solitary and social, and very much engaged within, including with our disquiet. For me, sports at midlife are not part of an arms race, they are part of coming home to myself as a physical, social and playful person who makes time for recharging mentally and physically every day. I wonder if some men feel the same way, or if sports are much more likely for you/them to be about proving rather than finding yourself?

]]> By: Stuart Baker http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1234 Stuart Baker Mon, 16 Apr 2007 10:22:21 +0000 http://www.thedisquiet.com/the-disquiet/the-arms-race-against-your-disquiet/#comment-1234 Dave, this is a great analogy, especially with the disquiet taken as a foe. It is a battle you can never win if you take the disquiet as a foe. In your blog "Friend or Foe" you bring out the expansive, alternate way of welcoming the disquiet as a friend. I find it tends to an ongoing dance that keeps getting more pleasurable the better that I take all of life as a really big gift. Stuart Baker www.consciouscooperation.com Dave, this is a great analogy, especially with the disquiet taken as a foe. It is a battle you can never win if you take the disquiet as a foe.

In your blog “Friend or Foe” you bring out the expansive, alternate way of welcoming the disquiet as a friend. I find it tends to an ongoing dance that keeps getting more pleasurable the better that I take all of life as a really big gift.

Stuart Baker
http://www.consciouscooperation.com

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